LUCID FORGE

If you think summer goes by fast when you’re young, just wait until you get older. This goes especially when you spend half of the sunny days of the season in a dark room watching movies. But living vicariously through movie characters ease the pain of not liking the summer heat enough to bask in it. So, in exercising that annual beginning of the school year tradition, here are some of the things I saw and did this summer.

1) Re-united with some old friends

This year I got together with some people I hadn’t seen in a while: Aslan the Lion, Batman, Hellboy, Mulder and Scully, and the ladies of Sex and the City. There was also (most of) the gang from The Mummy, and the Hulk was back though he looked a little different. Of course the one guy we were all waiting to see again was Indiana Jones, although by the time he left, many of us couldn’t remember why we were so desperate to see the guy again in the first place.



2) Made some new friends

By far, our most favourite new friend of the summer was the titular robot from Wall-E, that little guy taught us all to love Hello Dolly again as well as some timely lessons about the environment and obesity. Speaking of lessons, the new Max Smart played by Steve Carell showed us that you don’t have to be built like Daniel Craig to save the world from terrorists. Meanwhile, Pineapple Express’ Dale and Saul learned that the best friendships are forged in the time spent running from ruthless drug kingpins and their lackeys.



3) Went to some weddings

First thing this summer was the Monaghan/McKidd wedding in Made of Honor, a lavish ceremony in the groom’s native Scotland which was interrupted when the bride’s best friend and (male) maid of honour pronounced his love for her. Naturally, they were married soon after. The next weekend was the Diaz/Kutcher nuptials that took place in the early morning hours following a lost weekend in What Happens in Vegas. And the long awaited weddings of Henry Jones and Marion Ravenwood, as well as Carrie Bradshaw and John Preston (AKA: Mr Big) rounded out May’s ceremonies, but in July there was the wedding ceremony of Sophie and Sky in Mamma Mia!



4) Listened to some cool music

The greatest part of The Wackness was its vintage 90s hip-hop soundtrack. It was just further proof that aside from merchandising opportunities, soundtracks continue to be a great way to set the mood in a film. Take The Dark Knight as well, it didn’t feature any popular songs, but the score by James Newton Howard and Hans Zimmer certainly was the emotional accompaniment to the on-screen action. As for individual songs, can you imagine that any other song could sync with the rhythm of Pineapple Express in quite the same way as M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes.”

5) Saw cars driving

And apparently I was one of the only ones too. Perhaps the rising gas prices stung too much, or perhaps the populace have realized that car racing is the lowest form of sport, but whatever the reason, the season’s two big car race movies failed to connect with audiences. Not the plastic-fantastic world of Speed Racer or the grungy, heavy metal world of Death Race. But if the audience is hankering, there’s always next summer’s sequel Fast and Furious.



6) Got involved in politics
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It’s an election year in the US and it looks like it’s going to be an election year here in Canada too. So it’s apropos to explore films about issues and government. The big one was Swing Vote, which sold us on the notion that even the drunkest, laziest, NASCAR-lovingest, back water American can get the message that each vote matters. Meanwhile, free speech was at the centre of Hamlet 2, War Inc. dealt with consumerism and war, and The Visitor and Under the Same Moon touchingly examined with the issue of immigration.

7) Did a little self-exploration

The Dark Knight was all about limits; how far can one man be pushed till he falls over the edge of madness? How much are you willing to let you principles be compromised in the face of vanquishing evil? The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants also did some soul-searching this summer, but granted it was much less intense than battling the Joker. Will Smith’s Hancock, a malcontent superhero, had to struggle to find his way back to being a hero, and Kung Fu Panda’s Po had to realize that he was one all along. Two Canadian films also handled the topic very well in Ellen Burstyn’s end of life search for her past in The Stone Angel to a little boy’s haunted life in Fugitive Pieces.



8) Discovered new skills and pursued new hobbies.

It was a very DIY summer and it all began with the “Heroes aren’t born, they’re made” mentality of Tony Stark in Iron Man. He went out and built himself a suit of armour to fight crime. Adam Sandler’s Zohan was also a self made man, a former Mossad agent that teaches himself to be a hair stylist. Meanwhile, it seems that since the end of The X-Files series, Fox Mulder discovered the simple joys of collage and scrapbooking. It terms of career changes, Step Brothers Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly went from stay at home slackers to starting their own entertainment company called Prestige Worldwide and Playboy Bunny Anna Faris discovered that it was hip to be smart and went to college.

9) Learned new things, like:

-Hutts can be gay and George Lucas’ well of ethnic and racial stereotypes to be exploited is endless (Star Wars Clone Wars).
-Woody Allen’s still got it (Vicky Christina Barcelona).
-Bullets only fly straight unless you believe otherwise (Wanted)
-Kung Fu (Kung Fu Panda)
-Don’t mess with the Zohan (You Don’t Mess with the Zohan).
-Apparently a demon can get a human woman pregnant (Hellboy II: The Golden Army).
-You can survive a nuclear blast in a lead-lined fridge (Indiana Jones and the Kingdome of the Crystal Skull).

10) Saw some movies both crappy and crowd-pleasing

The former: Speed Racer, Postal, Love Guru, Meet Dave and Clone Wars
The latter: Iron Man, Wall-E, Hellboy II, The Dark Knight and Pineapple Express